It Wasn't So Bad
by Killer-San
Summary: What would you do if you were stalking a plant man, and he locked you both in a closet? Recently rewritten o3o NO, this is not as wrong as it sounds.


Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Naruto, But I Do Own This Way Of Being All Like! 'I Dont Own Naruto But I Own Sumfin Else!'

Psycho: o.o Pssssst Zetsuuu

Zetsu: Eh??

**Zetsu: Don't Fuck With Me, Little Girl**

Psycho: Mah Goodness Someones Cranky!

Zetsu: Actually I'm Just Hungry

**Zetsu: -Smirks-**

Psycho: o.o

-

"Talking"  
'Thoughts'  
(Me Addin' Shit)

**Zetsu's other voice**  
-

"This is _so_ not cool."

Sakura had been sent to a bed and breakfast inn to collect information on a man with supposed information about the Leaf. Well, as she was finishing her breakfast in the common room discreetly, the man in question had walked off towards his room. Sakura had then collected her things and followed him, but little did she know that he wasn't heading for his room.

The man was strange, and obviously frightened many people with his appearance.

He looked like a giant Venus fly-trap, with green grassy hair and black and white skin. His eyes were different shaped and pupil-less, with a dark yellow that filled them.

She had followed him, and now she was stuck in a closet with the strange man, and was locked in.

_**"What are you trailing us for?"**_

_"Who sent you?'_

"I..erm.." She was so shocked by his appearance she couldn't really answer what he had said.

Up close she noticed that he had white dots going up the side of his black side, and that his eyes were more like honey bowls, not just flat out yellow. He was almost like a plant, with split personality disorder.

"Uhm.."

_**"Spit it out then, wench."**_

_"Behave, She not have been following us."_

**"_Maybe your right, Zetsu. An ordinary ninja wouldn't act like this if they got caught."_**

She didn't know if it was simply too dark for the man, so called Zetsu, to see her but she did know that playing stupid like this would be an easy way out of this situation.

"I-I..swear I wasn't doing anything wrong! Its just..You looked..Erm.."

_"Interesting?"_

_**"Psh. She probably wanted to capture us and sell us to a freakshow."**_

_"Behave."_

"I was going to say interesting, I swear!" Obviously the white side was nicer than the black side, it would do best to side with him.

He gave her a half your-so-bullshitting-me, half 'really?' look that slightly scared her. She knew she was in a dangerous situation like this, with a criminal that has split personalities and could freak out at any moment.

Zetsu shifted and stood in front of the closet door, the light that came from under the door blocked by his enormous size.

_**"I really don't believe you."**_

Even though she couldn't see, she could almost feel his judging gaze upon her.

_**"Your a ninja from Kohana, Aren't you**_**_?"_**

"I..erm.."

_"Damn, it figures."_

_**"We can't trust her with what she might have seen."**_

_"I knew I saw that pink hair somewhere before."_

_**"Yes. This is indeed Sakura Haruno."  
**_

"I didn't see much of anything I swear!"

_"And how can we trust her?"_

"Well I haven't punched you out of here yet, have I?"

**_"But thats because it won't work. You cannot break our fly-trap."_**

_"Indeed."_

She was quiet, and started struggling to squeeze past him and break down the door. But she was held against the wall again, the rough wood making her current position very uncomfortable.

_"Please do not make our job any harder than it already is."_

_**"Yes, we're supposed to be on vacation."**_

Her eyebrow quirked at the sound of an S-rank criminal on something like vacation.

"Right."

The plant man shrugged above her and pressed her harder into the wall.

_"We really do not like abusing women but we'll have to if you keep putting up a fight. We don't have any interest in you."_

_**"Well, except you**_ do_** look quite delicious.."**_

_"Behave."_

_**"Well she does."**_

_"Behave"_

_**"You can't deny that she would look ravishing on-"**_

_"Be-HAVE!"_

If there had been any light in the broom closet, Sakura would have looked scared as hell at the thought of being eaten. She was desperate to get out.

"Er..Can I go if I promise not to tell?"

**_"Ninjas don't make promises. They all break them."_**

Sighing, she tried to think of a way to get out before she pissed the white half off too, and her chances of escaping were leveled down to zero.

"What if I can prove that I won't break my promise?"

_**"And how would you do that?"**_

"Like this?" She leaned up blindly in the darkness and pressed her lips against his warm skin. She didn't know if she had kissed the Right or left side of his face but she figured either one would do.

She heard him take a sharp intake of breath at the sudden contact, and she realized he'd probably never even been touched in a loving way. Maybe he'd never even been touched at all, or kissed. The petal-colored girl felt a twinge of regret that she was taking advantage of him like this.

"S-see?"

The man was very quiet, almost silent until words started bubbling out of his lips like a river.

_**"What did you do to me?"**_

_"I hope your lips weren't laced with poison."_

"I didn't kiss your lips."

_"..So"_

If this had been another circumstance she just might have laughed at this tall, dark and scary looking man being so childish.

_**"How exactly did kissing me prove that you won't betray us?"**_

"Well considering that I kissed you would mean that I like you enough not to tell!"

She felt him get off of her enough to give her some breathing room, much the less move around. She hadn't realized he had been so heavy.

_"You should leave before I change my mind."_

She ran as fast as she could away from that closet, right out the door and into her room, plopping rather ungraciously on her bed.

He hadn't been so bad, if you got past the venus-flytrap/thing. He'd looked kind of..

Sakura shook her head and buried her head in her pillow, getting some sleep before she fled like hell back into Kohana, her mission only _half_-failed.

But then she couldn't help chuckling at her little joke.

Half-Failed.

Half-man.

Half-person.

Half-love.

-

Woooo! Done XD I might write a sequel to this but it was more of a "Wow I'm FUCKIN' BORED!" thing. Hm..I might write one if I get some reviews asking me to.

Now I Will Write A LONG Line Making You Want To Review Me!

-

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_**:3 You Know You Want Too  
**_


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